she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Ladies don't puke and tell
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
