that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
