We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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