I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
