i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
