I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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