so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i just had sex bonerless
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
