What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
