Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
