found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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