Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
