apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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