over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
