I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
