Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
