I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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