How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
