They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
