I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
