I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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