scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
