i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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