I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
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