They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
