i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
