walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
