Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize