just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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