There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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