you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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