We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
