There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize