I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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