So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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