What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
