AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize