tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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