is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
third nipple confirmed
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
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