You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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