I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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