I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
