So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
