Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize