I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
