I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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