i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
