At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I smell like Dick and happiness
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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