were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
