I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
