Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
im on a boat
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