Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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